On A Night Like This
by itzalliballi
Summary: New Years Eve party. What will the stroke of midnight bring for these characters when they are forced to make decisions about themselves, as well as others. MerDer, Addex & Mizzie R&R! Songfic for Trick Pony! LAST CHAPTER UP!
1. Chapter 1

**Now, when I was a young girl**

She couldn't figure out how he talked her into it. It was a bad idea. She knew it was. He used to be her intern. and he was practically her best resident. She worked with him practically everyday. Whoever thought he would take a real interest in OBGYN? She surely didn't, and she definitely didn't expect him to ask her to go with him to the party. She was in such shock that she couldn't even come up with the word "no". Before she could even answer, he said "Great! See you there!" and walked off. Jackass. Either way, She was there in her red dress that left little to the imagination that was pulled together in the center into a knot of sorts, and for the first time since she could remember, she didn't care. She wasn't married, or at a formal gathering. She was at a work party, and could dress however she damn well pleased. By the look on the guy's faces in the room, she did a pretty good job. She even spiral curled her hair, which she was certain took more effort than necessary. After all, it was Karev. To match the dress she was wearing a necklace that had large multi-colored beads that looped around her neck twice- by far her favorite thing she had on.

"Addi?" The familiar voice shook her from her thoughts as she turned around to find Mark, dressed in a navy blue suit, with a gray shirt under. Sighing slightly in disappointment, she offered him a small smile, with a small trace of genuine happiness to see him..

"Hey Mark. Didn't think you'd come here." She turned back around to face the party as he steps up to become level beside her. She hated the effect he had on her, so she always tried her best to seem nonchalant when he was around. Trying to the best of her abilities to ignore the butterflies in her stomach, and the intense feeling in her knees, dooming them to collapse if he stepped any closer.

"Chief's orders." Mark mumbled, messing with his hair slightly to make sure it was just right.

"Yeah. I mean, God forbid your midnight kiss be with someone you'll ever see again!" Addison rolled her eyes, scanning the room for her, well for lack of better wording, date. The shorter this conversation was, the quicker she could forget about it. The last thing she wanted was to bring in the new year fretting over Marcus Sloane, again.

"Exactly!" Mark chuckled, not quite catching the sarcasm practically dripping from her lips. "But you know, we can always ditch this like we used to." He grinned as his eyes traveled down the length of her dress and back, taking in her every curve, and shimmer of her well-toned skin.

"Ugh. How were we ever friends?" Addison eyed him for a moment before returning her attention to the decorations of the party. She was trying her best to ignore how nice he looked, and how tempting it really was to leave with him. They'd done it countless times before, and if Callie wouldn't kick her ass for it, she might actually take him up on it. Plus, she had a date, even if she couldn't find him at the moment.

"Friends?" Mark quirked his eyebrow at her. "That's what you call what we were?" He turned his body towards her, folding his arms against his chest in a huff. He knew he'd messed it up pretty bad with her, but it was still a low blow to call them friends!

"Meant about as much." Addi sighed, not wanting to continue the conversation anymore. She didn't mean for it come out that way, she didn't even believe it. She cared about Mark a lot back in New York, and if she let herself think about it longer than absolutely necessary, she would probably admit that she still did, if not more. But she would never let herself think that far, and neither would Callie, her one and only girl friend in Seattle. Well, besides Miranda, of course. But Miranda had a family, so they didn't exactly socialize like her and Callie. Especially after Callie and George called it quits, the two had practically been inseparable after work.

"Thanks Addi! Really." Mark scowled as he returned his attention to the party. He'd shown up to the party, and had been excited to see Addison alone. They hadn't spoken much lately, and then she says something like that. People called HIM cold-hearted. If it was anyone else, he wouldn't have cared what they considered him. But she wasn't just anyone- she was Addi, the only person he'd ever loved- not counting those you're required to love. Even those, Mark was pretty iffy about most of the time.

"No problem." she quipped back finally spotting Alex coming towards her from across the room, offering him a genuine smile as she thought about where the night might lead. She had to find a way to get rid of Mark before he got over, the last thing she wanted to hear was Mark's smart ass remarks about the two of them. In fact, she didn't really feel like listening to Mark's remarks about anything.

"Well look who it is! Not working out now that you don't have my bed? That's a shame!"

Derek snarled from behind, each of them turning around with a scowl on their faces. His tantrum was beyond old news.

"What's wrong, Derek? Meredith realize she could do better than you too?" Mark chuckled, gaining confidence by the moment, recovering from Addi's blow. He could practically feel the daggers stabbing him from Derek's eyes, but he didn't care. He was sick of the bickering.

Addi wanted to mention the fact that she left him and went back to Derek, but she wasn't quite in the mood for the fact that he was a manwhore even when they were together to be thrown back in her face, so she just kept her mouth shut. She turned back around towards the party, noticing Alex getting closer, thankful that pretty soon he could save her from this hellhole of a conversation. She suddenly didn't care about anything the two attendings would say about Alex, as long as he would pull her away from them.

"Why are you even here, Mark? Nothing is here for you!" Derek snapped back, already becoming impatient with waiting for Meredith, who was in the bathroom, apparently doing whatever it is that girls do in bathrooms that take an eternity and a half.

Even Addison winced at the harshness in Derek's tone. She offered both of them a small frown in apology for her role in it. She hated that she'd destroyed their friendship. She was actually proud of Mark for trying to become friends with Derek again, even if they both knew that would never happen. Forgiveness was never one of Derek's abilities. Ever. "Calm down, guys. We're in public!" Addison ran her hands gently through the front of her hair to calm her nerves, still careful not to mess up any of the curls.

Both of the men took a deep breath and nodded before their attention turned to Alex, who was quickly approaching them. Each eying her oddly, making her want to crawl into a hole wearing 7 in heels rather than explain why he was coming over. But it was too late.

"Hey Addison." Alex smiled nervously, not even daring to touch her in front of Derek and Mark. He was honestly just hoping she'd acknowledge him. He would have stayed away if she wouldn't have seemed so pleading for him to come. The longer he stood with the trio, the worse the self- chastising became on himself. What a moron, he wanted to exclaim, inevitably slamming his forehead against the palm of his hand.

"Dr. Karev?" Mark raised his eyebrow, his eyes darting from Addison to Alex, and back again, asking the unspoken question.

Addison, completely avoiding their gazes, turned to face Alex, offering him her best smile. "Karev! Let's go get a drink!" she grabbed onto his forearm, pulling him away quickly to the bar that was conveniently set up on the other side of the room, right next to wear Izzie was sitting.

**My dad warned me about the opposite sex**

Alex Karev was confident about a lot of things. He was confident in his work, in his goals, and most of the time, in women. But one thing he was NOT confident about was Addison Montgomery. He'd known her for a solid year, and quite frankly, yet to see any flaws. Well besides the obvious, adultery and divorced. But who was he to bring someone down for having sex? Exactly. And divorced? Who isn't these days? He'd been at this party for half an hour talking to Izzie, who'd insisted on helping him get ready for the party once he hinted that he had a date. They'd spent twenty entire minutes bickering on his shirt. It was pink, and Alex was not amused. Eventually, she convinced him that the striped jacket was manly enough to balance out the shirt. He didn't believe her exactly, just like he didn't believe only real men wear pink, but he was tired of arguing about it. Especially with Izzie. He swore to himself everyday that he now only saw her as a friend, but sometimes when they hung out, he had to remind himself of that more often that he probably should. She still hadn't dated since Denny, which made it difficult for him to move on. What if she still cared about him, too? He didn't tell her who his date was, mostly because he wasn't sure if she'd even acknowledge him. He didn't really give her a chance to say no. There are just some blows to the ego he couldn't take. In hindsight, being blown off in an empty hallway would probably be better than in a crowded room full of co-workers, but there's a reason hindsight is 20/20. He was starting to wonder if she was even going to show. He kept scanning the room looking for her, but so far he wasn't having any luck. He'd tuned out Izzie several minutes before due to his nerves building up.

"Alex?" Izzie snapped her fingers in front of his face to get his attention. Alex wasn't known for paying attention to people, but he had always paid attention to her. She was starting to get a serious complex about the dress she was wearing. She was suddenly cursing herself for not changing, that is until she remembered why she didn't. Denny. She'd been told enough times by now that it wasn't the LVAD wire cutting that killed him, that it was the clot, but that didn't stop her from cursing herself every now and then when it came to being indecisive. Especially with dresses, so she wore the first dress she tried on. After spending so much time getting Alex ready, she didn't have a lot of time to get herself ready. Which was probably even better. Alex was her ride to the party, and he wasn't exactly known for his patience. Much less for a dress. Now she was practically being ignored, she didn't like it one bit. On top of that, he wouldn't even tell her who his date was. She never meant for it go this far. She was just planning on taking a few more months to move on from Denny, but as the months passed, and then some more passed as well, she lost her nerve. What if he'd moved on? Now he had a date. She was determined to be happy for him, no matter what.

"Huh?" Alex turned back towards her with a sheepish grin. "Sorry Iz. Did I mention how great you look?" His smile brightened as her cheeks flushed.

"You think you're such a charmer, Alex." Izzie laughed, shaking her head, even though she was going to take anything she could get. It felt nice to be reveled in.

"You know it." Alex winked as he let out a soft chuckle, reaching out his hand for hers.

"Right." Izzie rolled her eyes, trying her best to ignore the knots in her stomach as he grabbed onto her hand softly, her palms quickly becoming sweaty.

"Wanna dance?" He spoke so softly that she wasn't sure she'd even heard him right. There were only a couple of people dancing, and dancing had never quite been Izzie's specialty. But as soon as she looked at him, she knew she would have to.

"Um. Drink 1st. Then dance. Okay?" Izzie smiled before walking away to the bar, that was only several feet away.

Alex watched her walk away with a grin plastered on his face before returning his attention to the party. He definitely didn't need her see him staring at her. She'd told him she couldn't, and he was determined to be her friend. Friends don't stare at friends walking away. They just didn't. Even though, he didn't see the problem. But that wasn't the point, he shook the thoughts off right before his eyes fell on Addison. His eyes bulged slightly as he took her in her appearance. She always dressed nice at work, but there was something different about her tonight. A glow he hadn't noticed before. She was standing next to Sloane, but she looked incredibly uncomfortable, and he felt the need to save her. Making eye contact, she smiled at him. He was going to take that as a sign that she would, in fact, acknowledge him if he walked over. He stood up to smooth out his suit before making his way over, completely forgetting about the dance he'd been promised by the blonde girl who watched him walk away, tears glazing over in her eyes as she turned her attention to his destination. Addison Montgomery.

** Please Review! **


	2. Chapter 2

**He'd say, 'Yeah, that just what you need"**

Meredith stopped in her spot as she was exiting the bathroom stall when she saw Callie standing at the only sink in the bathroom. They'd actually become good friends for a little while, but after George had called it quits, Meredith didn't see her around much, and when she did, she was with Addi. Meredith sort of made it a point not to bother Addi more than necessary. If she was Addison, she wouldn't want to see her at all.

"Hey Callie." Meredith finally blurted out once she caught Callie's attention, mostly by her lack of breathing.

"Hi." Callie offered a half smile as she switched her weight from her left to right foot, fumbling nervously with the contents of her very tiny purse.

"How are you?" Meredith shook off the nervousness as she made her way to the mirror, beside Callie. Whether George admits it or not, she was a part of their family at one point.

"I'm good, and you?" Callie moved over slightly so that Meredith could wash her hands. The water running seemed to calm both of their nerves, causing them both to let out a small laugh.

"Good. Haven't seen you around much, though." Meredith frowned fighting the urge to pull her into a hug.

"Yeah. George apparently doesn't want me around. I'm really sorry, Meredith. We should go to Joe's or something though. Okay?" Callie nodded as she zipped up her purse, slinging it on her shoulder before returning her attention to Meredith.

"Sounds good!' Meredith smiled before mimicking her actions. "Happy New Years, Callie!" Meredith smiled before making her way to the door.

"Hey Mer?" Callie's voice cracked slightly as Meredith turned back around to face her, with one hand on the handle. "He's okay, right?"

Meredith frowned as she considered the question. "He's getting by, I guess." Callie nodded, and Meredith once again gave her a soft smile before leaving the restroom.

**"Some crazy boy with wild ideas"**

As soon as Meredith left the bathroom, she smiled at Mark and Derek standing side by side. That is untill she saw them watching Addison walk away- with Alex! There were so many things wrong with this picture, that she had to question it's reality. She blinked her eyes several times, and when she refocused her attention, the two men had stepped away from each other considerably far, probably sending death glares to each other, as usual, and Addison was out of sight. Meredith sighed as she ran her hand through the end of her ponytail before making her way over.

"Hey you." She smiled as she gave Derek a sideways hug before turning to Mark. "Hey Sloane." Meredith's head went back and forth between the two men. "What am I missing? How is it that both of you are still standing?" Meredith laughed, but she was the only one. "Alright. I tried. I'm going to go talk to Izzie." She sighed as she placed a soft kiss on Derek 's cheek, and squeezed Mark's arm slightly before walking away, but was quickly pulled back by Derek, a smile plastered on his face.

"Not so fast, missy. That's not a very good greeting, or a goodbye kiss for that matter." He pulled her even closer to him before cupping her face, and kissing her lips softly. The kiss was quickly deepened, and Mark became uncomfortable. Fortunately for him, Callie made her way up to them, clearing her throat to make them stop, which they did.

"Thanks Torres." Mark grinned as she made a stop next to him. Giving a faint smile to Meredith and Derek before scowling at Mark.

"Shut up Sloane." Callie rolled her eyes at him. She'd slept with him several more times since George broke it off, but that didn't mean she had to like him. He was just always a willing participant, and she would be lying if she said it was a bad time. She just didn't want Addi to find out. Whether she admitted it or not, she knew Addi still had a thing for Mark, something she definitely didn't understand, but whatever.

Mark's grin disappeared quickly. What was this, Pissed off at Mark day? Damn. Okay so Addison and Derek might have possibly had an excuse, but Callie didn't! Shaking his head, he turned to Meredith, apparently the only person who could stand his existence. With a grin on his face, he nodded goodbye."Happy New Years, my one and only other dirty mistress!" Not even bothering to look at Derek for his reaction, Mark walked away to avoid having to suture his face on New Years. What a way to bring in the new year that would be.

**Please Review! **


	3. Chapter 3

**"You know what always happens next."**

Izzie Stevens took a sense of pride in her appearance. Sure, when she was at work, she didn't care, but when she took time to actually prep herself, she expected people to take notice. They ALWAYS did. Even when she didn't want them to. Needless to say, after five minutes of standing across the bar from Alex and Addison without being noticed, her blood was starting to boil. Wasn't there some sort of rule saying you can't go after McDreamy's ex-wife? If there wasn't, it should be effective immediately. As she watched them interact, she was certain the rule might have come too late. Like she thought it needed to be said! MCDREAMYS EX WIFE, PEOPLE! Several other doctors had approached her with various pick up lines, but she simply rolled her eyes at them, and sent them on their way with their pride irrevocably deflated, at least until they were too drunk to remember the encounter, which for some of them was more sooner than later. She didn't care about any of them. Because none of them were the one that held her in his arms countless nights after Denny died without even a spoken word of appreciation passed. None of them were Alex Karev, and that simply wasn't enough for her.

She watched on with amusement as Addison tried to convince Alex to dance, and Alex simply shrugged the idea off, ordering another drink. He'd asked her- something she suddenly adored. She was now determined to get her dance now more than ever!

"Stevens." Mark leaned onto the bar, blocking the blonde's view of the couple she'd been eying with green eyes of envy, sending her a grin that only he could pull off without being immediately smacked in the face less than a moment later.

"What do you want, Sloane?" Izzie sighed, still offering a small hint of a smile none the less. She didn't have the heart to completely blow Mark off. After all, he was the reason she finally got to get back in the OR. Even if it was just viewing. She had a soft spot for him, something that not many people in the hospital could say about the plastic surgeon.

"A very strong drink, and a woman named Candy Cane that walks around in clear lingerie all day. But unfortunately, Christmas already passed, and she wasn't under my tree." He sighed, sounding truly disappointed as he got the bartenders attention. "So I'm going to settle for a double scotch on the rocks. What about yourself?"

Her eyes, once again, traveled to the other couple at the bar, and for the first time both of their eyes were on her. Perking up, she leaned slightly towards Mark, whispering into his ear, seemingly seductively. "I wanna.." She paused for a moment, letting her breath tingle his earlobes before continuing, a devious twinkle in her eye that only Alex could see from the way she'd positioned herself. "I want to dance."

Letting out a soft chuckle, he quickly gulped his drink before placing the empty glass on the bar. "That, my pretty, is something I can help you with." He backed away from the bar just enough to offer her his hand, that she quickly accepted, only throwing a quick glance towards Alex, who suddenly didn't seem quite so interested in the way Addison's dress fit.

Izzie instantly recognized the song that came on and couldn't help but think of Alex as her and Mark came to their place on the floor. It was Nearness of You by Norah Jones. Several more people had started dancing since Alex had asked her, and for that she was thankful. Hoping they would blend in with the rest of the crowd. Most of them she'd never seen before.

_**Its not the pale moon that excites me  
That thrills and delights me, oh no  
Its just the nearness of you**_

As the lyrics of the song filtered the room, Mark's grasp on her filtered her thoughts of Alex from her mind. There was something about the perfection of his grasp that truly made her want him to be the one she was dancing with. Both of his hands were placed firmly on her hips, but they weren't necessarily in a protective grasp, more like a guiding force. She couldn't help but find comfort in the way his cologne calmed all her fears, and smile at the way her arms looped perfectly around his neck, giving perfect access to gently caress his neck in the process.

_**It isnt your sweet conversation  
That brings this sensation, oh no  
Its just the nearness of you**_

She smiled as she felt his hands pull her slightly closer to him, a move that she didn't protest. The longer their bodies swayed together in bliss, the harder it was for her to laugh off the thoughts of Mark. Scary part was that he hadn't even really laid on his charm like he usually does. He'd just simply asked her to dance. Something she'd wanted so badly from someone else, but Mark was just so.. inviting.

"Mark?" Izzie whispered softly, sometime in her train of thought, he'd began to softly massage her hips with the tips of his fingers, and it was having more of an effect on her that she particularly cared to admit to anyone, but especially to Mark. No wonder so many girls slept with him.

_**When youre in my arms and I feel you so close to me  
All my wildest dreams come true**_

She was slightly surprised when his hands immediately shot up to the opening of her dress in the back, trying to stnfle her laughter, she gently moved his hands back down without making a scene, smiling at him to confirm that she hadn't been uncomfortable.

Finally getting his grasp together again, he leaned forward into her ear. "Thanks for the dance, Stevens." His voice was low, and it caused goosebumps to appear on her arms.

_**I need no soft lights to enchant me  
If youll only grant me the right  
To hold you ever so tight  
And to feel in the night the nearness of you**_

She could have sworn the lights dimmed even more, but as she looked around no one else seemed to notice, so she just smiled up at him before returning to her perfect position against his body, a position she found quicker than she'd expected. "Thank you." she whispered, a smile on her lips.

The two danced in silence for the remainder of the song, each reluctant to let go at the end, but they did. Sharing a soft smile and a nod, they seperated, going opposite ways. Mark watched her for a moment before calling her name softly, but loud enough for her to hear over the soft music.

Turning around with a smile on her face, she met his gaze. "Yeah?"

"Save me another dance later?" He grinned as he stuffed his hands into his pockets.

Simply nodding, she turned back around to head for the bathroom. Trying to forget all the feelings that'd risen so unexpectedly. She couldn't take Mark seriously, right? She shook her head no, her eyes keeping to the floor as she walked right by Meredith and Cristina without even noticing them.

**I tried to heed his advice**

Callie Torres was an outsider in the walls of Seattle Grace. It was obvious to anyone that walked the halls at all, patients and doctors, alike. She'd molded herself into the group for awhile, but there are just some things that weren't meant to be. Sometimes no matter how much someone loves something, or someone, the absolute best thing you can do is let them go silently. And Callie had. Almost. She'd stopped asking for interns for cases all together, although Miranda liked to randomly send George to her. In a way it made her day, and in others it completely ruined it. He wasn't hers anymore, not at all. She was having trouble accepting that. It was rare that she wasn't the first to move on. But it was George. Her George O'Malley. Well, before that, he was the guy that saved the patient in the elevator, but that wasn't the point. She loved him, and she absolutely detested the idea of bringing in the New Year with anyone else. Especially Marcus Sloane, who, if she kept drowning the shots like she was, was who she'd inevitably leave with. She'd been at the part for two hours now, it was now rounding at ten o' clock, and Mark had already bought her two drinks. That was in between dancing with Stevens, and she wasn't sure, but she could have SWORN, she saw him dancing with Addison at one point. Or was that Derek she dancing with? Wasn't Karev her date?

"Cals?" Addison's concerned greeting shook the thoughts from her mind, atleast momentarily, as she turned around to meet Addi's gaze.

"Hey Stranger!" Callie smiled as she patted the seat next to her. "Sit. Talk. Chat. I need.. well.. I don't know what I need. But I know you need to sit." Callie laughed as she recrossed her legs. There was a covering to the table that practically went to the floor covering her legs, but she'd heard too many stories about pervs sitting under the table to be that trusting.

"How much have you had to drink, hun?" Addi chuckled softly as she took the seat next to her friend. It'd been a very strange night so far, and it was only halfway over. All she wanted to do was sit and laugh, which is exactly what her and Callie did. They sat and laughed.

"Only a couple.. bottles?" Callie giggled, before shaking her head, no. "No, I don't know. But this wine is excellent. You should try it." Callie confirmed before finishing the little remainder in her glass off.

"I will get right on that." Addison nodded, grinning as a waiter replaced the empty bottle in the middle of a table with a full one, and then as Callie's eyes glazed over with happiness. "But I think you've had enough, hun. The trick is to pace yourself."

"But I dont want the new year to come, Addi. I just.. I just don't!" Callie sighed, dropping her head so that it was resting on her forearm, that was placed perfectly on the table.

"Oh. You got a time machine? Because I tell ya, Callie. If you do, and you haven't told me, that would be a very cruel cruel joke!" Addi grinned immediately as Callie's threw her glares that clearly stated she was no longer a welcomed guest in her pity party.

"Not helping, Addi." Callie groaned before finally sitting back up. "I hate men." She sighed, quickly unzipping her purse, feeling the need to reapply her lipstick.

"I'm sorry, hun. But it's New Years Eve! Wallowing is not an option! Only laughter! See!" Addison let out a fake laugh, but it quickly became genuine as Callie started laughing too.

"Was I seeing things or were you dancing with Derek AND Mark?" Callie's face grew serious as she watched Addi contemplate her answer.

"Would you believe me if I said you were seeing things?" Addi quirked one eyebrow, this was NOT the laughter-filled conversation she was planning on having at all.

"Possibly. But now? No. I need the details, missy." Callie grinned as she turned towards Addison more directly.

"Boo!" Addison stuck out her arm, her thumb pointing towards the floor before replacing it in her lap ,and sighing. "Fine. Yes. I danced with the exs."

"And why would you do that?" Callie was confused. Wasn't Derek with Meredith? And Mark.. well Mark didn't particulary count because.. well he was Mark. "And what about Karev?" Callie was getting more thrown off by the situation the longer she thought about it. Surely, the wine hadn't clouded her thinking that badly. Okay, maybe it had. But still.

"I don't know. It wasn't like we were whispering sweet love nothings in each others ears. It was just a couple of dances. Karev was dancing with Stevens. Apparently he promised her the first dance or something. I don't know." Addison waved her hand in the air to show that it was no big deal. Even if she had been slightly hurt, as she'd already told Callie, that was not funny!

"And what about Meredith?" The conversation earlier with her had once again but Meredith in the list of people Callie felt the need to protect.

"She wasn't wallowing in self doubt if that's what you're thinking! I think she was dancing with Mark or something!" Addi suddenly felt the need to drink. Callie was depressing her on New Years Eve. NYE was supposed to be FUN!

"Okay." Callie nodded, promising herself she'd talk to Meredith later. "I miss George." she sighed, slumping in the chair as she poked out her lower lip.

"Why don't you go see him?" Addi suggested mindlessly, it just seemed like the only real option she had if she wanted to fix the problem.

"Really? You don't think he'd mind?" Callie nibbled on her lower lip softly in contemplation.

"I think it would be a good way to bring in the new year!" Addi avoided the question slightly, because she honestly had no idea about O'Malley. She would always be Satan to O'Malley. She'd accepted that a long time ago.

"Thanks Addi!" Calli stood up quickly, but was back in the seat in just a moment's passing of time. "Erm. Wanna help me call a cab?" Callie giggled as Addison rolled her eyes at her.

"Come on, Cals. Let's go." Addison laughed as she helped Callie onto her feet, heading for the exit.

**Please Review! **


	4. Chapter 4

_**But now I'm thinking it sound kinda nice**_

It hadn't even been a year since Derek became a divorced man. It hadn't even been a year since he cheated on Addison with Meredith at the hospital's prom, right after dancing with his wife. The oddness of the situation did not pass him by as he once again danced with Addison, even though this time there were a lot of differences in the situation. One, he was with Meredith now. He adored the fact that Meredith was confident enough in their relationship that she didn't make a scene about it. After all it was just a dance. He couldn't even remember how it happened exactly. How he went from being harsh towards her, to dancing was beyond him. Maybe he just simply didn't care anymore about them. It was just that Mark made him so angry. About the only thing that was the same at this party was that the entire dance he was staring at Meredith, who was practically glowing. God, he loved her so much. He'd even teased Addison, playfully of course, about coming with Alex. Something along the lines of following in his footsteps, and maybe a bit about making him proud, which he quickly received a slap on the arm for. He couldn't help but be jealous that Meredith was dancing with Mark though. She'd made it very clear to him that he was going to have to get over the fact that she had male friends. It wasn't the male friends that bothered him, it was just Mark, and their dirty mistress club. Neither of them were mistresses, so he didn't see the need. Well Mark might possibly be, but she wasn't! He'd long ago given up the argument though, because at the end of the day, much like today, she would be in his arms, and that's all that mattered.

Several songs had now passed since he'd started dancing with Meredith again, and each song he pulled her tighter to him, refusing to let another person take her from him for the rest of the night.

**Thank you for this moment  
I've gotta say how beautiful you are  
Of all the hopes and dreams I could've prayed for  
There you are  
If I could have one dance forever  
I would take you by the hand  
Tonight it's you and I together  
I'm so glad I'm you're man**

"I thought you didn't dance in public." she whispered into his ear, a knowing grin on her face.

"I didn't do a lot of things before I met you." he replied before spinning her in a twirl that wasn't quite as far away from him as it probably should have been, not that either of them minded.

"Good to know." she giggled as she buried her head back into his chest, taking in the scent of his cologne, her favorite scent in the whole world. Most people would agree it smelt nice, but she doubted it smelt like home to anyone else. Not many people can say cologne smells like home, but it did. He was her home. Always.

"I'm not the guy I was, Mer." Derek smiled as he took one hand away from her waist to wisp away her bangs from her face.

"That's too bad.." She smiled as she ran her fingers through his hair. "I happened to love that guy in the bar."

**And if I lived a thousand years  
You know, I never could explain  
The way I lost my heart to you that day  
But if destiny decided I should look the other way,  
Then the world would never know  
The greatest story ever told  
And did I tell you that I love you tonight?**

"Told you that you would!" He grinned before leaning in to capture her lips again.

"Well, you are a neurosurgeon for a reason." She laughed as she nibbled on his lower lip softly, her fingers playing with his tie-less collar, trying to resist the temptation to start unbuttoning his shirt right there in the middle of the dance floor.

"Teasing isn't nice, Mer. In front of all these people, no less." He pulled away slightly, straining his neck to avoid getting carried away.

"You just like sneaking." she laughed as she pulled him back to her, once again latching onto his lips with hers, this time with no protesting from him.

**I don't hear the music  
When I'm looking in your eyes  
But I feel the rhythm of your body  
Close to mine  
It's the way we touch that sends me  
It's the way we'll always be  
Your kiss, your pretty smile you know I'd die for  
Oh baby, you're all I need**

"Only with you." he grinned before pulling her closing to him again, resting his hands on her lower back.

"Well I would hope so." Meredith smiled as she rested her head, once again, against his chest. Her eyes traveling to Addi and Callie sitting at a table. She couldn't but wish George would somehow show up for Callie. She knew he wanted to. He was just stupid, as far as she could tell. They were absolutely adorable together, and George was just being stubborn. If she knew anything, it was that being stubborn helped no one. ever.

She'd been trying all day to tell him the most important news she'd had to tell him, probably ever. She'd yet to be able to find the perfect time, and she was starting to think there wasn't any. If he was happy, she was scared he wouldn't be after she told him, and it he wasn't, then she was scared he would freak out anyway. Cristina said she would give her $50 if she told him before midnight. Two hours to go, but she just didn't see it happening. He just looked so happy. Not to mention how much it freaked her out to see him dancing with Addison. Sure, Mark helped her keep her cool, but her blood was practically boiling. What the hell? The only thing that comforted her was the distance the two were keeping from each other, even while dancing, and the fact that, once again, he was taking her breath away by looking at her.

"Derek?" She didn't even try to hide the cracking of her voice. Her nerves were completely shot, and this single conversation was going to determine, pretty much, the rest of her life.

**And if I lived a thousand years  
You know, I never could explain  
The way I lost my heart to you that day  
But if destiny decided I should look the other way,  
Then the world would never know  
The greatest story ever told  
And did I tell you that I love you  
Just how much I really need you  
Did I tell you that I love you tonight?**

"Meredith?" his eyes turned a soft color of gray as they filled with worry. "What's wrong?"

Shaking her head, she smiled up at him. She wiped the stray tears before cupping his face in the palm of her hands. "I love you so much, Derek."

"I love you too, Mer." Derek let out a soft chuckle as he pulled her closer to him, closing all distance between them. "I could have sworn we've been over this." He smiled, trying to rid her of her worries.

"I.. I have to tell you something." Her voice was so low, he had to struggle to hear them. "But I have to ask you a question first. And you have to be completely honest. Okay?"

"Of course." He nodded in agreement, his smile never straying from his features.

"Why didn't you and Addi ever have kids?"

**(Song Greatest Story Ever Told- Oliver James)**

_**It's just what I need on a night like this**_

Addison had somehow managed to get Callie to the cab downstairs without any major catastrophes occurring. When she got back, she found Alex sitting alone at a table by the bar.

"Hey you." she smiled as she took the empty seat right next to him, careful to keep the tape on her dress intact.

**At the devil's party nothing's a sin  
At the devil's party we know where you've been  
If we're all right then tell me who's wrong  
The love in a war, where do we belong?  
I might believe it's love, you might believe it's war**

"Hey." he grinned. "Thought you'd skipped out on me." He turned in his chair so that his attention was fully on her, and not on Izzie, who was once again dancing with Mark. He would swear every time he looks at them, they are just a little bit closer. He'd already fought the urge to go Chief style on them and demand that they stay arms length away from each other at all times, but he was pretty sure Izzie wouldn't appreciate that.

"Yeah." She sighed, not being able to help the small grin from forming on her lips. "Had to help Callie into a cab."

"Going to see O'Malley?" Addison simply nodded as the knots in her stomach that she hadn't had since earlier that evening were starting to reform.

**At the devil's party there's no light from the sun  
At the devil's party, now, life's a loaded gun  
More or less? No, less is more  
Go on and be my guest  
Where do we belong?  
I might believe it's love, you might live a little more**

"Wanna dance?" He was getting tired of this party already, and he'd barely spent anytime with Addison. He had a tendency to get stuck in the past whenever Izzie was around, and that wasn't fair to Addison at all. He extended his hand out to her to lead the way, not even considering any other option.

Addison could feel her palms starting to get clammy, and that was the last thing she wanted Alex to see, so instead she quickly stood up, mumbling something about the bathroom, and quickly made her way to the exit, leaving a very confused Alex once again alone at the table.

He quickly made his way to his feet, and went after her, catching just shy of the elevator. Grabbing her arm firmly to stop her from going any further.

"Where are you going?" he questioned, slightly out of breath from the chase.

"I told you I'm going to the bathroom." She lied, darting her eyes around the hallway, anywhere but his eyes.

"Try again! You passed those a good 25 steps back. Now, where are you going?"

**Dreams of yours, dreams of mine  
Dreams of all that shine on the other side, on the other side**

" I just need to get some air, Alex." She lied once again trying her best to just put some space between herself and him. He was clouding her judgment. She'd heard rumors about his sleeping habits. It annoyed her that she always attracted the man whores. Well, Derek wasn't a man whore, but it's not like that ended well either. The last thing she wanted was to trust another guy again and get screwed over, and every cell in her brain was telling her to just walk away from this situation.

"So, we'll walk outside, you didn't have to run out on me like I'm a crazed madman!" It was so hard to resist him when he said things like that. Sometimes she wonders if guys have mandatory classes they go to to learn how to coax a woman into agreeing to do anything. Alex could easily be a teacher.

She frowned softly at him, trying to apologize for how this would most likely end. "Alex.."

"Addison. Come on. You can't leave before midnight! No one does that!" It was a bad argument, and he knew it. But he didn't particularly want to spill to her how he felt about her when he wasn't even sure what that was. He just knew he wanted to be near her.

"This was a mistake." Addi sighed, finally meeting his gaze with her own. Her eyes were full of sorrow, which just made him want to reach out and hold her. An impulse he didn't get for many people- at all.

"What was a mistake? Our date? Addison, it's just starting!" He reached out his hand to grab hers, and was relieved when she didn't pull away. Not to say that she embraced it, but she allowed it anyway.

"No. Yes. Maybe. Alex, you're my resident! This can't end well! It just.. it can't!" It was hard for her to protest against anything when he was rubbing small circles in the palm of her hand. It was practically cheating.

"Who says? You can't shoot us down, NOW, Addi. You just.. you can't. Unless you don't have any feelings for me at all. But if you do, will you please just dance with me?"

**At the devil's party watch them stare in vain  
At the devil's party, now, you're no friend of mine  
Oh, lonely days of the road to excess  
When you're on fire you burn like the rest**

Addison darted her head between his extended hand and the elevator that was now open, practically screaming at her to get on. But it was New Years, and he was Alex, the guy she shouldn't want, but does anyway. Going against all better judgment, she intertwined her fingers with his as he led her to the dance floor, quickly pulling her close to him once they'd reached a clear spot. "I'm glad you stayed." He whispered into her ear, a thick straight line of goosebumps protecting her spine.

"Mmhmm." She managed to get out with a genuine smile as she tightened her grasp around his neck. "Thanks for asking."

"And miss out on this? Not a chance." He grinned happily as he once again pulled her just a little closer than really necessary.

Both were surprised at how 'normal' it felt to be in the arms of the other. There was something so calming, so needed about it. Something neither of them were willing to lose easily.

"So, we're going to play a game." Addi smiled at Alex sternly, indicating that he didn't particularly have an option in this. So he simply nodded, and waited for her to continue . "How did you know I would show up?"

Alex chuckled softly as he shook his head. "This isn't a game, Addison. This is like interrogation."

She slapped his should playfully, laughing at his remark. "No, it's not! It's twenty questions. Now answer!"

"I didn't." he admitted, his cheeks blushing slightly at the admission.

"And you came anyway?" She raised an eyebrow in amusement as he bit on his lower lip, probably thinking of the best way not to sound like a loser. Deciding to save him from more misery, she spoke again. "That's adorable, Karev. Really."

"Hey! None of that!" He glared playfully at her. "Anyway, my turn."

"Nope. You don't get to ask questions." She grinned, thoroughly enjoying being in control of the conversation.

"Oh no. Definitely not. This is not Let's Dissect Karev's Life game!" He shook his head in defiance.

Sighing, she nodded. "Fine Karev. It's your turn."

**I might believe it's love, and you might believe it's war  
Why don't we take a little less? Then we could live a little more  
Dreams of yours, dreams of mine  
Dreams of all that breathe on the other side, on the other side**

"Excellent." He grinned as he began to ponder the perfect question to ask her. "Why did you come?"

"That's easy. Chief's orders!" She giggled, knowing that wasn't the answer he was wanting. After receiving a warning glare, she sighed and shrugged her shoulders ." Well, I'd be lying if I said I didn't think about it. I mean there's no telling how weird work is going to be tomorrow. But I guess, possibilities. Possibilities make up your life, and you have to take all the ones you can."

"You so want me." He smirked as she slapped his shoulder once again. "Don't worry. You don't look too bad either."

"You're such an ass." She laughed, partly from his remark, but mostly from how this night was ending up. Not too bad at all.

**(song is Devils Party by INXS)**


	5. Chapter 5

_**A long walk in the dark  
Someone I can't resist  
A little rendezvous, a little mystery  
When I look at you  
I think that's just what I need**_

_"I.. I have to tell you something." Her voice was so low, he had to struggle to hear them. "But I have to ask you a question first. And you have to be completely honest. Okay?"_

_"Of course." He nodded in agreement, his smile never straying from his features._

_"Why didn't you and Addi ever have kids?"_

**Everybody wants to be loved  
Every once in a while  
We all need someone to hold on to  
Just like a helpless child  
Can you whisper in my ear?  
Let me know it's alright**

The question threw Derek off guard. Addison was rarely brought up in conversation between the two of them, in fact he tried his best to forget about the time he spent away from Meredith. It just seemed like a lifetime ago.

"Well, uh.." Derek wasn't sure how to answer the question, it wasn't exactly his story to tell.

"Derek?" Meredith's fingers ran gently through his hair, pulling his attention to her once again. "Are you okay?"

"Huh? Oh. Yeah. I'm fine. It's just been really long time since someone asked me that is all." He tried to smile, but the light in his eyes that his smiles were characterized for never made its appearance.

"Well?" Meredith was getting nervous. What if he didn't want their baby? She didn't think she could kill it. She just couldn't, but she would never put another person through what she went through as a child.

**It's been a long time coming down this road  
And now I know what I've been waiting for  
And like a lonely highway, I'm trying to get home  
Ooh, love's been a long time coming**

_You'd think being medical students, the newly weds, well not quite two years anyway, would feel at least a small bit of confidence as they sat in the doctor's office. They didn't. In fact, they felt like incompetent idiots. They'd been quiet during the examination, trying to soak in and remember all of the comments, so they could figure out the meanings, but by the time they talked about it, all the comments had jumbled together, and they left the office just as confused as they'd come. Now they were back, the results were in. They'd been trying to get pregnant ever since they got married, well Addison had been. Derek had tried to start the process way before that._

_"Mrs. Shepherd, Nice to see you again." Dr. Willis entered the room with a thin file in his hands, gently closing the door behind him, before making his way to his chair behind his desk._

_"Please, call me Addison. This is Derek, my husband." She smiled as she squeezed Derek's hand for comfort. She received a welcoming smile from the doctor, but even before he spoke, she knew something was wrong. He had that sympathy look. She hated that look._

_Derek saw the look too, and couldn't quite get his grasp on Addison's hand tight enough. Ever since he'd gotten married, all he'd thought about was having a son, and now this doctor was most likely going to tell him that it wasn't a possibility. How dare he._

_"Addison..." The doctor opened up the file, looking over it one last time before breaking the news. Wishing there was something he could say beforehand to make it better. "I'm so sorry to tell you this, but having a baby isn't an option. It seems that you're infertile."_

_Tears sprung to Addison's eyes as Derek's grip went lose on her hand. A part of her told herself that it was just shock, that he didn't mean to, but another part, a bigger part, knew that Derek stopped loving her in the goddess way he had since they'd met at the moment. She couldn't give him the one thing that he wanted so badly. All she wanted him to do was to hold her and whisper that it would be okay. But he didn't. He sat motionless in his chair, staring out the window. Infertile. She was infertile. Just like that, her whole life's plan was crashing down against her._

_"I.. I don't understand." Addison stumbled on her words. She'd been healthy her whole life. She never missed her 6 month checkup. How could this happen?_

_"I'm sorry." Dr. Willis hated this part of his job. "But you still have options. Adoption." He tried to smile, but seeing as how he didn't even get a response from the husband, he suddenly felt even worse for the woman above him. "I'll give you two some time." He nodded before making his way out of his office._

_"H.. How did this happen, Derek?" Addi whispered into the thin air, not receiving a response from Derek until 15 minutes later when he quickly stood up from his chair._

_"We should go. He probably needs his office." Without waiting for her, he made his way to the door, and left, leaving Addison to deal with the grief by herself. She didn't make it to the car until a half an hour later. It was that day she decided she was going to OBGYN._

_"It's going to be okay, Addi." Derek whispered as she slipped into the car, but she didn't believe him. He'd abandoned her in her worst time of need, and she just wasn't interested in what he had to say anymore._

_"Of course it is, we're Derek and Addison." She nodded her head before leaning it against the passenger side window._

**You can look for a lifetime  
You can love for a day  
You can think you've got everything  
But everything is nothing when you throw it away  
Yeah, then you look in my eyes  
And I have it all once again**

"I.. I'm sorry, Derek. I shouldn't have pushed it." Meredith's eyes fell to the ground, not sure if it was inappropriate to tell him anymore.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, Mer." Derek smiled sadly as he ran his thumbs across her cheeks. "So why did you ask?" He asked, completely oblivious to the parallel she was trying to draw.

"So.. you want kids?" She asked, the smallest glimpse of hope flashing in her eyes as she waited for his answer.

He let out a soft chuckle as he kissed her forehead. "I'm willing to do any and everything you want, Mer." Did he want kids? Sure. But he'd let go of that dream a long time ago. At least most of it. He couldn't live without Meredith. He just couldn't.

Meredith smiled up at him as she rested her hands on his shoulders. "You didn't answer my question." She was trying her best to conceal the tears begging to be released.

**It's been a long time coming down this road  
And now I know what I've been waiting for  
Just like a lonely highway, I'm trying to get home  
Ooh, love's been a long time coming**

"I.. I want you to be happy, Mer." He nodded his head as he pulled her slightly closer to him so that there was no space between them. "I love you."

Despite her best efforts, the tears escaped as she buried her face into the nook of his neck. "I love you too, Derek."

"Then, why are you crying?" He chuckled softly as he ran his hands through her ponytail, inhaling the lavender scent that he'd become so accustomed to.

"I.. I'm pregnant, Derek."

**Didn't know I was lost till you found me, uh huh  
Didn't know I was blind but now I see  
Can you whisper in my ear?  
Let me know it's alright**

For a moment, Meredith questioned whether or not she'd actually said it outloud. The only confirmation she had was that he'd stopped dancing. He was now standing still in his place, staring at her. His smile hadn't completely faded, but it wasn't quite full force either. It was taking every ounce of power in her not to run away. She couldn't run away from this because she'd just wake up tomorrow and the baby would still be there. So instead she cupped his face into her hands, making his gaze meets her forcefully. "Derek.." Her voice cracked slightly as the fear of raising the baby alone ran rapid in her mind.

After a few more seconds, Derek's smile brightened, now into even more dreamier state than usual as his hands that'd been grasped together firmly around her waist slowly made their way around front, landing plumply on her still flat stomach, before he leaned in and kissed her lips softly.

**It's been a long time coming down this road  
And now I know what I've been searching for  
Been down a long, long highway and now I see  
Ooh, love's been a long time  
Ooh, been a long time**

Meredith's tears, now of joy, now spewed over her eyes as she watched him drop to his knees to place soft kisses on her stomach, trying his best to kiss through the loose fabric. She could swear he was whispering to the baby, but the music drowned out any chance she had of hearing them. Only word she could make out was "baby."

**Love's been a long time coming**

Finally, Meredith's eyes left his shortened form to the crowd of people now standing around them, her cheeks quickly blushing as she pulled on him to stand back up. Her eyes landed on Addison whose eyes seemed to have teared over. It was like she knew. A part of her wanted to apologize, she wasn't exactly sure why, they were divorced, but she could never really apologize for the life growing inside of her. She loved it too much already, so instead she smiled softly at her before meeting Derek's gaze and pulling him into a kiss. Mumbling I love you against them, she turned around to find that Addison was no longer in the spot she'd last seen her, and Alex was running after her.

"Derek.." Meredith sighed as some of the onlookers returned their attention to their previous tasks. "I think you should talk to Addison."

Song is Long Time Coming by Oliver James


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Thanks so much for the reviews guys! Enjoy! Song is Someday by Nickelback  
**

_**Now, my momma told me,  
'In this dog-eat-dog world  
Baby, you gotta work  
Harder than a man'**_

Derek met Meredith's gaze for a moment before giving a small nodd and left the dance floor after Addison. He only looked back once to find that Mark had started dancing with Meredith, so that she wouldn't be left abandoned. Not that he was exactly abandoning her, but the room was full of nurses who loved to talk.

Offering a small nod to the both of them, he returned to his mission of finding Addison, although he was certain he already knew where she'd run off to. Where she always went when she was upset. Shopping. This time, the hotel's gift shop, that just happened to be open 24 hours a day, was the closest store she could find. Especially on New Years Eve. It almost made him laugh how predictable she was. Well, it was funny because it wasn't true. If it was, he would have seen her affair with Mark coming. He didn't. Sure he knew her favorite ice cream, but he couldn't remember the last time, even when they were together, that he'd bought her any. Sure he knew that she loved silver more than anything else in the world, but it'd been years since he'd bought her any that wasn't for a special occasion. He had failed her, and it was just now that he was coming to terms with that. He'd failed her the day they'd gotten the worst news of their lives. He'd abandoned her, and he'd continuously done it time after time since. How could he really blame her for finding comfort in someone else? He wasn't blind, he'd seen the way Mark looked at her. He'd even seen how his ex best friend's eyes darkened, yet lit up, whenever she entered a room. But it wasn't like it was uncommon for her to get a man's attention. She was gorgeous. Apparently, she couldn't keep his though. Now, she had to witness him getting the one thing that practically made their marriage fell, and he didn't know what to do. He hated not knowing what to do. He was a surgeon, he was suppose to be precise, and quick witted, and all knowing. Derek Shepherd was utterly at a loss.

**How the hell did we wind up like this  
Why weren't we able  
To see the signs that we missed  
And try to turn the tables**

Standing outside the shop, he could see her fragile form leaning into Alex's chest as his hands ran softly through her curls that seemed to shake along with her body. He'd been so caught up in his life with Meredith, that he'd all but forgotten about how the redhead had dealt with the ending of their marriage. Not to say that there weren't sometimes he wondered if his life would be easier if he'd just stayed in the marriage, especially when Meredith had him sleeping on the floor due to a fight, but the outcome was always the same. Addison just wasn't his soul mate. Didn't mean he didn't love her. You can't spend that many years with them and not consider them always and forever family.

He waited until she gathered her composure before making his way quietly into the store, which was thankfully deserted besides them three, and the employee who was too engrossed into a tabloid magazine to even realize that a woman was breaking down in the corner of the store. He felt like yelling at her, but as he took in her appearance, he just pitied her. She couldn't have been over the age of 23, and she was stuck at work alone on New Years Eve, with nothing but a magazine to keep her company. So instead, he held his tongue as he passed the counter and made his way to the back where the other two were. He had more important things to deal with than make a young girl cry.

**I wish you'd unclench your fists  
And unpack your suitcase  
Lately there's been too much of this  
Dont think its too late  
Nothin's wrong  
just as long as  
you know that someday I will**

Addison could feel his presence way before she saw his lonely figure approaching her. Or maybe it was the sound of his steps that she'd memorized long ago. In medical school, she learned how if an infant hears a heartbeat, it will put them to sleep. Something about that's the only sound that comforted them in the womb. That's how she felt about his steps, whenever she heard them approaching her, her body immediately relaxed, even if only for a moment. She knew why he was there. He came to say goodbye. A real goodbye. Not the goodbye they said the day he left New York, or even the day they signed the divorce papers. This was goodbye to any possibility of anything between them. This was goodbye to an era full of mistakes and love lost.

The moment she forced herself to meet his gaze, she wanted to crumble into a ball in the corner that was only several feet away, and pray that Alex would send him away, but she didn't. In fact, she stood a little bit straighter, and grasped onto Alex's forearm tightly, willing him to please not leave her even though she knew he would have to, because she needed this. Apparently so did Derek, at least she hoped he did. He'd finally gotten everything he ever wanted, and she wanted so badly to be happy for him, she really did, but she couldn't quite get the corners of her lips to curl upwards, she just couldn't. What about her? What about her dreams? She'd told countless couples in her career to consider adoption, but it just didn't seem applicable to her. Not only was she now single, but she worked an insane amount of hours. Life just seemed to be playing a cruel joke on her that never ends. And now, whether he meant to or not, was going to rub it in her face.

"Hi." she whispered meekly. She could feel Alex's eyes dart from her to Derek and back again, asking permission to be dismissed from the inevitable uncomfortable conversation, but she didn't have the power in her to let her go. What if she needed him again? What if Derek was crueler than she even expected him to be?

"Hi.." He echoed her soft greeting, forcing a small, but genuinely sad, smile onto his face before nodding his head to Alex indicating that it would be okay for him to leave. He hated to see Addison so fragile. She'd always been the one that was together in their relationship. He wanted to just hug her and promise that her life was going to get better, but he couldn't promise that anymore. No matter how much he wanted to, because he couldn't keep that promise. Nor would he particularly be around to make it seem it that way. But he was hoping that someone would. He'd rather it be Alex, than Mark, but if she was happy, he might could learn to keep his tongue bitten with him too. Well, he could try.

**Someday, somehow  
gonna make it all right but not right now  
I know you're wondering when  
(You're the only one who knows that)  
Someday, somehow  
gonna make it all right but not right now  
I know you're wondering when**

Addison finally forced a nod in Alex's direction, accompanied by a smile, no matter how microscopic it was. She watched helplessly as he walked away from her and out of the store, using every fiber of her self control to not call him back to wrap her in his arms, and promise that he'd be there for her, much like he'd done before Derek walked up. Once he was out of sight, she returned her attention to her ex husband, who seemed to be contemplating his options. Options that she wasn't sure that she'd like any of them. Not that it really mattered.

"Take a walk with me?" Addison couldn't help but smile at the faint memory of one of the many times he'd said that to her. One in particular was followed by a marriage proposal in Central Park. This walk wasn't going to have a fairytale ending though, and it almost made her want to say no. But she shook the memory off, and linked her arm with his as they made their way outside and stopped on the sidewalk on the drop off to the cemented road.

He took off his coat to place it on the cement for her to sit on, under the assumption that she probably paid thousands of dollars for that dress, just as she'd done countless times before. Silently accepting his unspoken invitation, she gently sat down, careful that the ends of her dress didn't drag on the dirt-consumed concrete.

"You look nice, Addi." Derek fumbled nervously with the pen that he'd removed from the inside pocket of his jacket, incessantly clicking it in and out of the hole that it'd been resting in. He'd been avoiding this conversation for a good ten years, and now he was forced to face it head on. He wasn't exactly on steady ground.

**Well i hoped that since we're here anyway  
We could end up saying  
Things we've always needed to say  
So we could end up stringing  
Now the story's played out like this  
Just like a paperback novel  
Lets rewrite an ending that fits  
Instead of a Hollywood horror  
Nothing's wrong  
just as long as  
you know that someday I will**

"Thanks." She whispered so softly that if it wasn't for the wind blowing in his direction, he probably wouldn't have heard it.

"I.." He began to speak, but quickly stopped, once again failing to find the words to give her the comfort she deserved. There was a reason he wasn't a writer. There was a reason he worked with his hands.

"Derek? Do you remember the first time we slept together in Seattle? The whole no anesthesia thing?" Addison's voice sounded much more certain that she felt, but she wasn't sure how long she was going to be able stand to sit in this position, and so the quicker the better.

"Gotcha." He chuckled softly as he readjusted his body slightly to stretch his legs. "The thing is.. I failed you, Addi, and I'm truly, deeply, unbelievably sorry that you had to go through our marriage alone." He sighed, preparing himself to continue before she tried to make him feel better. He didn't deserve it.

"Derek.. I wasn't.." She was cut off by the shaking of his head, realizing that it was a useless protest. They both knew she'd been alone.

"My entire life's plan crumbled to nothing that day in the doctor's office, Addi. It took me a long time, mostly just now, to realize, to really realize, that your's did as well. I'm sorry that I failed you, and if I somehow EVER made you feel unloved, I'm so incredibly sorry I did that. You have to believe me. I'm sorry that I couldn't pull myself together enough to help you pull yourself together as well. Maybe everything would have been different. Maybe everything wouldn't have gone wrong, and maybe we wouldn't have fallen out of love. But none of that matters, because we did. And I think, we both fell in love with someone else." A small smile appeared on his face as he looked over towards her. "I know I did."

**Someday, somehow  
gonna make it all right but not right now  
I know you're wondering when  
(You're the only one who knows that)  
Someday, somehow  
gonna make it all right but not right now  
I know you're wondering when  
(You're the only one who knows that)**

Addison couldn't stop her stomach from churning violently at his final confession. She'd always known, but it was never easy to hear that from your ex husband. She offered him a faint smile as she began to play with the hymn of the bottom of her dress. He was saying everything that she needed to hear for closure, but he hadn't gotten to the part that was going to make her break. He hadn't finalized the fact that Meredith Grey was now pregnant with his child. His lovechild. "I'm so sorry, Derek." Tears trickled down her face as she tightly closed her eyes together, praying that the last ten years had all been just a bad dream. That it really was her who was having Derek's child, most likely a son just as he'd always wanted, because Meredith Grey gave him everything he ever wanted.

"It wasn't your fault, Addi." Derek draped his arm over his shoulders, pulling her shaking body into his, providing at least a small amount of comfort as he placed a small kiss on the top of her head. "You just have to believe that we weren't suppose to have kids, no matter how much we loved each other at the time. Ya know?"

**How the hell did we wind up like this  
Why weren't we able  
To see the signs that we missed  
And try to turn the tables  
Now the story's played out like this  
Just like a paperback novel  
Lets rewrite an ending that fits  
Instead of a Hollywood horror  
Nothing's wrong  
just as long as  
you know that someday I will**

"So, I guess Congratulations is in order, huh?" she chuckled softly as she breathed in the all too familiar scent of his cologne. It'd been such a long time since she was close enough to draw comfort from it.

"I don't expect you to be happy about this right now, Addi. But I hope one day that we can get past, well, our past. Before we started dating, you were my best friend. Not that I would EVER admit that to Mark." Derek laughed, forgetting if only for a moment that Mark was no longer his best friend.

"Your secret is safe with me." She smiled before removing herself from his grasp. "I.. I am happy for you, Derek. I really hope that Meredith can give you everything..." Addison smiled softly at him before continuing, "that I couldn't, and even more!"

"Yeah?" His voice was full of false hope, almost making Addison rethink her next sentence, but knowing it was necessary.

"Of course." She nodded before swallowing the lump in her throat. "But we can't ever be friends."

**Someday, somehow  
gonna make it all right but not right now  
I know you're wondering when  
(You're the only one who knows that)  
Someday, somehow  
gonna make it all right but not right now  
I know you're wondering when  
(You're the only one who knows that)  
I know you're wondering when  
(You're the only one who knows that)  
I know you're wondering when**

Derek sighed, knowing that she was right. It would be cruel and unusual punishment to everyone involved. Himself included. "But we're okay? I mean.. I don't have to worry about you like skipping town without telling anyone or anything?" He joked, remembering the time in college that she disappeared for a weekend without telling anyone. "Which by the way, you still haven't told me where you went that weekend!"

"I went to Las Vegas." She grinned, recalling, very vaguely, spending all weekend in the casino, only to come out winning $20, which she had to spend on food.

"I KNEW IT!" Derek accidentally yelled remembering finding a hotel key that had LV in small letters on the side. Derek looked down at his watch to reveal that it was now 11:30. "We should probably get back inside before the nurses start up their conspiracy theories!

"Oh God." Addison rolled her eyes at just the thought of the stories that'd be circulating at their return. She watched as he stood up before extending his hand to help her up, which she quickly accepted, since she wasn't sure her heels would allow to stand up alone.

Once she found steady ground, Addi turned to him, pulling him into a tight hug. "Goodbye Derek." she whispered softly as she placed a soft kiss on his cheek.

Derek watched as she walked away with a small smile on his face. "Goodbye Addi." he whispered into the wind once she was out of earshot.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Song is Dear Jamie.. Sincerely Me by Hellogoodbye. This kinda fast forwards to get it all out instead of multiple posts.  
**

_**And she'd say, 'Yeah,  
That's just what you need  
Some romance book Romeo  
Calling you at work  
And messing up your plans**_

Callie was so consumed in her thoughts that she didn't even realize she didn't have cash on her until she reached the hospital. Luckily, the driver informed her that Addison had paid her fair. With a smile on her face, Callie clumsily stumbled out of the cab, making a mental note to buy Addison a day at the spa, well if George would talk to her anyway.

**Dear Jamie, I've got a letter I would like to send  
It's lacking strings of words with punctuation at the end  
But should I trust this dialect  
To convey the right effect?**

She was pleasantly surprised to find that the hospital was practically empty, which was probably a good thing since most of the staff was across town getting wasted. She made her way into an empty on call room on the second floor before she paged George - not a 911 obviously since it was an on call room, but she did mention that it was important. It was. It was now 11:45, she only had fifteen minutes for him to get there, and then make him understand how she felt about him. Then she got the worst feeling that maybe he was in surgery, and wouldn't be able to come, causing her to cast a blow to a forehead with her palm, muttering idiot to herself. She probably should have asked a nurse. They know everything that goes on in this hospital. It was quite freaky actually.

**Dear Jamie, I've got some things I'd like to set in pen  
I would have used a pencil but lead's just not permanent  
Should I trust my printer's ink  
To express the things I think?**

Her self deprecation was brought a screeching halt as the on call room door opened with a huff to reveal her guy. George. "Hey." She whispered softly, suddenly sobering up, at least a little bit at the sight of his sluggish appearance.

"Callie? Wh.. What are you doing here?" George stuttered slightly at her dressy appearance. "Why aren't you at the party?"

**Every time I tried my best to think of something to contest  
With inside jokes and other folks who've got much more to say**

Callie's eyes darted all around the room, but they inevitably landed back on George. "Because.." She sighed as she walked slowly up to him, causing him to lean against the closed door. "Because it's New Years Eve. And You're supposed to bring in the New Year with the person you love. And I love you, George. I love that your friends call you Bambi because you are so incredibly sweet. I love that when you look at me, my stomach turns to knots, and my brain turns to goo. And yes, I realize that coming from a doctor sounds really stupid and immature, but I don't care because it's true. I love you, George. And if you would just take the time to think about it, you would see that you love me too. I know you do. You have to. Because I've seen the way you look at me. Please George. Please just give me another chance to love you." Callie's eyes were now filled with tears and she darted her eyes to the clock on the call that revealed that it was now five minutes untill midnight, and she'd made a pact with herself that if he said no, she was going to get out of the room as quickly as possible. She didn't want to bring in the new year with him if she couldn't kiss him. Where the hell is a mistle-toe when you need one?

**Dear Jamie, this envelope will represent my heart  
I'll seal it, send it off and wish it luck with its depart  
And this stamp will be every action that carried my affection  
Across the air and land and sea**

Callie was only two, possibly three, feet away from him, but as he broke eye contact, she could practically feel an ocean being built between them. Her heart was breaking, and he couldn't even look at her. She knew it was a bad idea. Why did she listen to Addison again? Oh right. Because Addison was happy. She wanted to be happy. Why couldn't George love her the way she loved him? Unrequited love has been written about for centuries, but none of them seemed to do her any justice. This was beyond brutal.

**But should I trust the postage due  
To deliver my heart to you?**

11:57. The clock was ticking away and he'd yet to move away from the door to allow her to leave, or said or done anything to make her want to do otherwise. Finally, he looked up at her, extending his hand for her to take to pull her close to him. Once the seeming ocean disappeared, she could feel the warmth of his breath on her skin, and it sent tingles up and down her spine.

**Every time I tried my best to think of something to contest  
With inside jokes and other folks who've got much more to say**

"Callie.." His voice cracked, making her hurt all the more.

"Please George.." Tears were filling her eyes faster than she could stop, some of them inevitably dripping down onto her cheeks, taking her mascara with it.

**Every page I tried my best to fill with something to contest  
with inside jokes and other folks who've got much more to say**

11:59. "I.. I love you too." He smiled as he brought his hands up to her face,cupping it gently as he wiped away the stained tears. By the time her tears dried, they could hear a faint yell of Happy New Year from the halls.

**I'll give you all I can  
A flower and a hand  
I hope this helps you see  
Signed, sincerely, me**

They smiled softly at each other before leaning in for a time honored tradition of a midnight kiss. "Happy new year, baby." Callie mumbled against his lips before deepening the kiss. Yep, Addison was definitely getting a whole week at the spa.

George responded by gently pushing her backwards onto a bed. "I'm so glad you came." he whispered into her ear softly before returning his attention to her lips.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey guys, I know this is kind of delayed. But last week's episode put me in the worst rut. It was just so sad! Anyway, this is finally written. I know there were several people wanting this to go the other way, but I hope you'll be okay with what I came up with! Song is Goodbye To You- Michelle Branch. Enjoy!  
**

_**But night falls, I slow down  
I start dreaming  
'Bout you coming around**_

After a quick stop in the restroom to fix her makeup, Addison was back in the ballroom with a smile on her face. Considering the night she'd had, she was feeling pretty good. Her eyes quickly found Alex sitting at a table by the bar talking heatedly with Izzie. Deciding to give him some time to deal with that, she scanned the room some more before she found Mark and Meredith sittng at another table, in a much better mood than the other pair. Taking a deep breath to gain some confidence to face Meredith, She straightened her spine and made her way over there, a casual smile on her face. She hoped it wouldn't be too awkward, but that was a lot to hope for.

"Hey you two." The easy conversation came to a screeching halt as soon as the female attending made her presence known. Addison watched as Meredith's eyes shifted behind her for signs of Derek, and she smiled softly to herself. "He's still outside, Grey. He'll probably be up in a few minutes or something. I don't know." Addison shrugged her shoulders, she really had no idea what his plans were, but when there was silence, she felt the need to fill it. That's what she was doing. In all aspects of her life really.

Meredith smiled before standing up. "Alright. Well It's getting close to midnight. I'm going to find him. I'll talk to you two later." Meredith nodded before quickly making her way to the exit before Addison called her name, causing her to turn around reluctantly. She was so close to getting away without any completely awkward conversation occuring. She didn't know what the two had talked about, and she didn't really need to know the details. As long as they both got some sort of closure. Closure was something that life rarely gave her an opportunity for, so when she saw it for others, she did try to encourage them to take advantage of it.

"Yeah?" Meredith fidgeted with her dress where her hands fell as she met Addison's gaze. Even through the distance in the darkened room, she could see a light sparkle in Addison's eyes that she hadn't seen in a long time, possibly ever. It was comforting to her.

"Congratulations." It took just about every ounce of her to say it, but she was glad that she did. It was needed.

An easiness fell over Meredith that she couldn't quite place, but it was enough for her to make light of the situation, even if it wasn't completely appropriate. "You know.. I am looking for a doctor."

Addison's eyes bulged slightly, but she quickly forced her features back to normalcy as she read Meredith's face for some sort of way to take it. "Uh.. wow. Really? Um. How about one step at a time, Grey?" Addison tried her best to let a laugh out, but even at a distance, it sounded forced.

Mark had sat quietly and listened to the exchange of the women. Not wanting to ruin or make something out of something that wasn't, but in this moment, he felt the need to intervene. It probably would have been funnier after a few days, but then again, timing had never been Meredith's strong suit. "Wanna dance, Addi?"

"Sure." Addi smiled appreciatively at him, before giving Meredith a small nod. Knowing she would most likely be the doctor anyway, she just didn't want to think about it anymore tonight. She needed time. Time was the key. Even if it was just two or three days. She could only come to terms with so much in a day.

**Of all the things I've believed in  
I just want to get it over with  
Tears form behind my eyes  
But I do not cry  
Counting the days that pass me by**

Mark quickly made the way to the dance floor, picking a spot that just so happened to be out of sight from the exit. He couldn't believe he was doing this. Over a few dances, none the less. He'd loved Addison for so long, it was hard for him to picture himself in a relationship with anyone else. But holding Izzie in his arms was a whole new experience. One he wasn't willing to give up on a small glimpse of an opportunity of an already failed relationship. Even if there was never going to be a 'them' again, he still cared about her. He'd known her practically half of his life, and he'd give her the world if she asked for it. "You alright, babe?"

Addison swooned in the comfort of his arms. They fought a lot. More than she did with anyone else, but at the end of the day, he would be there for her in any way she let him be, and that's why she loved him. But if she'd learned anything from Derek it was that love wasn't always enough. In fact, it rarely was. Especially when it came to Mark. Things were just so complicated with them. She wasn't sure they'd ever be able to sort through everything that'd happened in New York. How had her life gotten so off track without her ever realizing it? "Yeah. I think so." She smiled softly at him before resting her head on his shoulders. She didn't want to talk about Derek. She couldn't. It hurt too much, especially with Mark.

"You know Addi, it's okay not be fine all the time. In fact, it's completely normal!" Mark chuckled lightly, pulling away just enough to look into her eyes.

"What's so good about normal?" A ghost of a smile peaked its way onto her face at the all too familiar banter between them.

"Was it brutal?" He asked in a much softer tone as he pulled her close to him again.

He could feel her shake her head no before she whispered the answer in a broken whisper. "He was Derek in his prime." She sighed, knowing that had to stop thinking like that. They didn't work together, and she knew that. She couldn't remember the last time she was happy with him.

"Good thing, I don't have to kick his ass then." Mark smirked, running his free hand loosely over her curls. He could hear a faint sniffle, and his heart broke for her. "You're going to make it through this, Addi. I promise."

"Thanks Mark." Something about the way he held her told her that he didn't plan on doing it for avery long time. An uneasy revelation to say the least. He was saying goodbye to her.

**I've been searching deep down in my soul  
Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old  
It feels like I'm starting all over again  
The last three years were just pretend  
And I said,**

"How did we let this happen, Addi?" Mark sighed, finally resting his hands on her lips, nudging her just a little closer, trying to remember what it was like when they were happy - together. Before everything got so messed up. Well, messed up between them. It was always pretty messed up.

Addi giggled softly. "My tenth anniversary. I remember 'hinting' to Derek for months about how much I wanted that silver necklace with the heart pendant, and a cupid charm in the center. I never told you how much I wanted it because I knew you would buy it. So the day comes, and of course, Derek canceled our plans, but told me my gift was in his bottom drawer, as if I didn't know!" She frowned for a moment before continuing.

"So, of course, thinking that he'd gotten me the only thing I'd talked about in months, I pretty much ran into the bedroom, and jolted open the bottom drawer. I mean I was ecstatic, Mark. I wanted that necklace so badly! I mean it couldn't have cost more than a hundred or two dollars, it wasn't like a diamond ring or something. So I find the box, and open it up to find a gold ring. Gold, Mark. I HATE GOLD.You know I hate gold, hell my mother knows I hate gold. My husband of ten years bought me a gold ring! So, of course, I went into sulky mode major for like an hour. Then there was a knock at the door. I figured it was Derek, trying to surprise me or something. But I didn't even want to see him. My own husband didn't even know me. But it wasn't Derek. It was you, and you had a box in your hand. And said 'Happy Anna - whatever, babe.'"

By then, Addison's eyes were glazed over, but Mark wasn't too concerned considering he knew how this story ended. He seemed to have a talent for that. After a few moments, Addison continued knowing that it was important. She wanted him to know that she really loved him. She did. "Of course, after rolling my eyes at you, I take the box. Cringing at the thought that it was like a matching necklace or something. Anyway, I open it up and there's that necklace that I'd been talking to Derek about for months. And It wasn't even my birthday. It was my marriage Anniversary and you bought me a gift! And then with tear filled eyes I looked at you, and my heart just melted."

"Then you kissed me." Mark grinned, recalling being promptly kicked out 10 seconds later. But it didn't matter, because every time he saw her for the next two months, she was wearing HIS necklace.

"That's how it happened." Addi smiled before burying her face into his neck. "I couldn't have survived without you." She mumbled against his skin, placing soft pecks along his jawline in appreciation.

**Goodbye to you  
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew  
You were the one I loved  
The one thing that I tried to hold on to**

"Do you regret it? I mean, after everything that's happened since. Even if it was another 6 months before we kissed again, do you regret it?" His eyes were full of sorrow and pain as he asked the question, but she quickly stood up straight, directing her eyes to his own before answering.

"You can never regret love, Mark." She watched as Mark's eyes lit up, making her want to kiss him. But as her eyes traveled to the table she'd first noticed in her entrance, she found her reason why she couldn't. And possibly his reason as well.

"Yeah?" He seemed surprised, but she knew him well enough to know that it was just his cocky ego kicking into overdrive. But just as quickly as the spark appeared, it went back into hiding. "Even if it wasn't enough?" She knew as well as he did that he wasn't just talking about their past. He was doing it now. He was saying goodbye. She just hoped he wouldn't say the words. She didn't think she could get out the words Goodbye Mark that night. Talk about bringing in a new year.

"Especially." Addi smiled softly before bringing him into a hug.

"You know I'm always going to be here, right? I mean, you can't just get rid of me because you want to have hott sex with Karev!" He chuckled as he promptly recieved a glare and a slap on his chest.

"There's the Sloane we all know and hate." Addison grinned as she stepped away from his grasp.

"Happy New Year, babe." Mark smiled softly, a twinge of sadness echoing in his words as he let her turn around and walk away to her new year, to Alex.

**I still get lost in your eyes  
And it seems that I can't live a day without you  
Closing my eyes and you chase my thoughts away  
To a place where I am blinded by the light  
But it's not right**

After leaving the exes to talk in the gift shop, Alex made his way back to find that the room had returned to normal. He was stopped by Olivia, who shyly asked him to dance. Something that slightly freaked me out, but he managed to politely escape after only two song. He spotted her sitting a nearby table, playing mindlessly with her phone. He smiled to himself as he made his way over.

"Hey Iz." Alex greeted her as he took the empty seat next to her. "What ya doing?"

"You know how when you were in high school, and your teachers gave you this like huge project due at the end of the semester, and went on and on about how procrastination was bad and how you shouldn't wait till the night before to start it."

Despite his evident confusion, he nodded as he let out a soft chuckle. He'd been the King of all nighters. "Definitely."

"I could never understand how someone could go straight home and start working on it when they had SO long to do it. I was always the last person. I couldn't ever get inspired to do any work done unless I was pressed for time, ya know? Then I graduated. And suddenly, I had to make my own deadlines. And I couldn't. Ya know? I just always needed that push."

**And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time  
I want what's yours and I want what's mine  
I want you  
But I'm not giving in this time**

"Are you okay, Izzie?" She wasn't making any sense. Deadlines? What was she talking about?

"I'm trying to say that I'm sorry, Alex!" She sighed, for the first time since he'd sat down, she met his gaze, her tears glazing over her eyes, blurring her vision.

"Sorry? For what?" Alex was racking his brain, how did he get so off base in this conversation? "Iz, you have nothing to be sorry about."

"I do. I really do. It wasn't suppose to go this far. I just wanted a little more time."

"Izzie. Babe. I am completely lost here. You gotta tell me what you're talking about!"

"I promised myself after Denny I wouldn't do it anymore. But it's just such an easy habit to fall back into. Ya know?"

"NO!" Alex exclaimed, running his fingers through his hair. "I don't know, Iz! Tell me!"

"I wanted to tell you that I felt the same way! When you kissed me. I wanted to tell you that my feelings for you weren't gone either. But Denny. I didn't want you to be the rebound guy. You were more than that. Time passed though, and we just pretended it didn't happen. And then I started to wonder if maybe you really had moved on. I couldn't face it. And now. Now you're with She-Shepherd! She's a freaking goddess! And I.. I'm just some girl that can't meet a deadline."

**Goodbye to you  
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew  
You were the one I loved  
The one thing that I tried to hold on to  
The one thing that I tried to hold on to**

"You're not just some girl, Iz. You're beautiful." Alex smiled softly at her, running a hand along her cheek for comfort. "But.."

"But then tonight.. I was dancing with Mark."

Despite Alex's overwhelming confusion at her confession, he couldn't help but smile at the glimpse of hope she held in her voice as she spoke his name, even if it wasn't his own. Even if he was happy for her, he couldn't completely let it pass without a comment. "Sloane? Really?"

"McSatan? Really?" She quipped back with an equally sarcastic grin. You can only beat fire with fire.

"Point taken." He grinned, relaxing back in the seat.

"We're still okay, right?" She eyed him carefully, searching for any signs of uncertainty. She didn't think she could manage without him as a friend.

"Better than ever." He winked at her before noticing Addison making her way over to them, leaving Mark on the dance floor in a sullen state. "Congratulations." He grinned as he looked down at his watch telling him it was ten till midnight.

"What do you mean?"

"Pressure's on. Ten minutes, Stevens." Alex nodded towards Mark before meeting her gaze, receiving an appreciative grin in response.

**And when the stars fall  
I will lie awake  
You're my shooting star**

"What would I do without you, Karev?"

"Apparently.." He stood from his chair as Addison was only several feet away. "You'd never have that extra push. Happy New Years, Iz."

"Goodnight Alex." Izzie watched in content as Addison made her way comfortably into the warmth of Alex's arms before excusing herself from the table.

"Everything okay?" Addison asked as Izzie walked away.

"Perfect." Alex smiled, meeting her questioning gaze. "You?"

Nuzzling her face into his neck, she responded in a whisper. "Perfect."

**Review please :)**


	9. Chapter 9

_**Moonlight, sweet bliss  
Melting with every kiss  
Dancing real slow  
When you hold me close I know  
It's just what I need on a night like this  
A long walk in the dark  
Someone I can't resist  
A little rendezvous, a little mystery  
When I look at you  
I think that's just what I need**_

_**- On A Night Like This- Trick Pony**_

By the time Izzie made her way to Mark, her cheeks were flushed,and she'd effectively gnawed on her lower lip hard enough to break the skin, but not enough to cause it to bleed. She couldn't believe what she was doing, and more than that, she couldn't believe who'd given her the push to do it. Alex Karev. The guy she'd wanted for so long. But more than that, he was her best friend. Well, George was too, but they were different relationships. George was her cuddling friend, Alex was more about the tough love. Something she definitely needed from time to time.

"Hey." She smiled nervously at him, coming to a halt at a distance centimeters short of arms length of him.

"Stevens." Mark smiled genuinely at the blonde. "Miss me already?"

"You keep telling yourself that when you're waiting for Candy Cane." Izzie grinned as she turned around to head for the exit. Already had talked herself out of it. What was she thinking? It was McSteamy!

**Could there be a different ending  
To the same old story**  
**'Cause you're not the first to say  
You're gonna be there for me  
I need to know what's in your heart  
Can you finish what you start  
How can I be sure I won't be sorry**

"Izzie!" Mark called out, easily catching up with her, stopping her in her tracks. "Where you going?"

"I.. um.. I can't do this." She sighed, looking over to Alex who was dancing closely with Addison.

"What? Bring in the New Year?" He chuckled softly at her, rubbing her hands with his own in soft circles.

Her eyes traveled down to her hands before looking back up at him. "I can't be just another notch on your bed post."

"Who said anything about bed posts?" He chuckled, knowing his reputation.

"Mark.."

"Stevens. Look. I would be lying if I said the thought hadn't crossed my mind. But that doesn't make you just another no name either way." He lifted her head to meet her gaze with a soft grin. "You couldn't ever be just another girl."

"How many girls have you told that before?" She asked with less confidence than she'd intended. She didn't know what to believe with him.

Mark sighed. "Just one."

"Addison?" She asked sadly, receiving a simple nod in response. She couldn't help but follow his gaze to the redhead.

"It's a new year, right?" She asked, hope evident in her voice, causing his attention to zone in on her.

"It is." He grinned, pulling her to him by the waist, receiving no refusal. "Well it will be."

An unknown song played in the air, and once again Izzie was lost in the touch of his hands. She was only vaguely aware of the fact that she would be thrown into the gossip mill once again about her choice of men, but she didn't care. The longer she inhaled his cologne, the less she cared about anything other than this night, which according to the large ticker in the front only had thirty seconds left in it. "Mark?"

Her voice was soft, and if she hadn't stopped trailing her fingernails routinely against the sliver of skin between his tux and his hair line, he might not have heard her call his name at all. "Yeah?"

"Thanks." She smiled at him, bringing her hands around to cup his face. She could hear the countdown begin, but she was transfixed by his hypnotic eyes to join along.

"For what?" He asked, despite the large lump that'd formed in his throat.

"Saving me." she grinned at him as "HAPPY NEW YEAR!" erupted throughout the room. She quickly pulled his lips down to hers.

"Happy New Years." they both mumbled against each others lips before deepening the kiss.

**When you tell me you're the one  
I've always needed  
You don't know how much I'm wanting  
To believe it  
But I've heard it all before  
Now I'm needing something more  
A promise is no good if you can't keep it**

Alex Karev was happy. Truly happy. He couldn't remember a time that he was so content in his life. Whether he admitted it to himself or not, he cared about Addison a lot, and tonight she was letting him. It was a good feeling. He'd started the night in complete limbo, and he'd somehow ended up releasing Izzie to someone else- again. What surprised him the most was that it wasn't that painful. Sure, he was a little sad as she walked away, but he didn't feel the need to down 10-15 shots of vodka, which was a huge difference from last time. "Did I mention that I'm glad you didn't laugh in my face when you got here?" He let out a small chuckle, wrapping his arm securely around her waist as he pulled her to the dance floor.

"Did I mention how happy I was that you saved me from the duo interrogation?" She sighed thankfully, allowing him to guide her through the crowd.

"You might have mentioned it." He grinned, pulling her as close as possible as the song overtook his senses.

"I'm glad I'm here with you Karev." Addi smiled before wrapping her arms around his neck.

"I'm glad you're wearing this dress." He laughed as he ran his rough fingers over her bare back, instantly receiving a slap. "Just kidding! Sort of." He smirked, pulling her back close.

"I'm going to let that go on the fact that.." Addi smiled as she rested her head on his shoulder.

"That what?" He smirked.

"That I like you." She blushed slightly as she felt a small kiss to her temple.

"Wanna know a secret?" He whispered into her ear.

"Always."

"This like you're talking about?" He lowered his voice even more as his lips rubbed softly against her ear lobe, causing her to swallow the lump in her throat in order to speak.

"Yeah?"

"It definitely could be mutual."

Addison was suddenly thankful that her dress was long sleeved so that he couldn't see the goosebumps that were making her skin bumpy like an old dirt road, something she'd never actually been on. "Oh yeah?" She smiled, tightening her grasp just a tad on his neck.

"I think it's safe to say." He grinned,lifting her chin to meet her gaze before placing a small kiss on her lips. "Definitely safe to say." He added, his eyes still closed from the kiss.

The roar erupted into the room as the buzzard sounded, causing their lips to gravitate towards each other once again.

"Happy New Years, Addi!" Alex whispered softly into her ear before returning his attention to her lips again.

**If heartaches and tears and shadows of doubt  
Are part of the deal, you can count me out  
But if you're talking about a game I can win  
You can count me in**

Meredith wondered outside once she finally saw Derek sitting on the curb, his face buried into his knees that were securely held together by the grasp of his arms. She tried to be as quiet as possible, but as one of her heels caused a splash in a small puddle, her attempt at being covert failed miserably.

He looked up quickly, half expecting Mark to be there, but smiled softly at her squinted eyes expression, much like a little child who got caught trying to eat a lollipop in a candy store. "Hey you." He smiled, his eyes drifting down to her stomach. "Sorry I took so long." He sighed, looking back down at his feet.

"You know, It's not nice to make a pregnant woman worry." She giggled, still in shock at the fact that she was pregnant.

"So I've heard." He looked up happily, stretching his legs out so she could sit on his lap. "Come here."

She willingly obeyed, careful not to fall as she lowered herself onto his lap. "It's almost New Years."

He looked down at his watch that read 11:56. "No kidding. Good thing you came and found me."

"We have lots of New Years kisses to make up for." She nuzzled into his neck happily.

"You're right. And next year we won't be alone." He cooed, rubbing his hands softly on her stomach.

"You're going to be a great dad, Derek." She grinned, placing her hand on top of his.

"This kid will have two great parents then." He saw Meredith smile, but could tell she seemed unsure. "I mean it."

"I.. I don't know, Derek. I mean.. My mom wasn't exactly around to show me." She frowned, not wanting to think about it anymore.

"We'll be okay. I know it." He grinned pulling her lips to meet his. "I love you, Meredith."

She smiled silently before deepening the kiss. Before they knew it, there was a loud roar throughout the city.

"This is going to be the best year of our lives, Mer."

"I don't doubt that at all." She smiled, a small tear rolling down her face. "Ugh. Stupid hormones kicking in already!" She laughed, pulling him into another kiss.

_**Okay guys, I know this was like a two and a half months late, and I'M SO SORRY! I couldn't get this chapter written for the life of me! So I'm sorry about that! But it's finally done, so for anyone who hasn't completely given up on this story! I hope you liked it! Please let me know what you thought! I hope everyone liked the ending!! Thanks for all the support! 3 **_


End file.
